July 23 Waning Moon

It is a very electric feeling talking about your dreams to someone who gets it. I just got done interviewing Cheyenna Weber and I felt so nervous about talking through my ideas with someone who is so seasoned and so rooted in cooperative work. I am happy that my ideas seem to make sense to her. I could tell that she could tell that I was a novice and it made me more nervous than was probably necessary. She gave me a lot of great leads and I find her work ethic amazing and inspiring. Her consideration for so many things at the same time makes me feel seen. I'm trying not to project my insecurities about this project onto what I think her thoughts are about me or onto my language when talking about her. My body is tingling with excitement and nervousness and some other things I can't label. I am realizing my need to connect to institutions more and more. Cooperatives are so invisible but they are also so vast and I think I need a stronger vigor to meet more people. I also need to hone more. Ugh! There are just so many things to think about but I am chipping at them everyday and for this reason I give thanks.

-MJ